4 letter word

I was perusing a catalog with a friend of mine when we came across some kitchy wrought iron words that you put on your wall - words like "live, love, laugh," etc.. One of the words was "hope." Here is the conversation that ensued:

F: "I hate that word; it's so depressing."

Me: "What word? Hope?"

F: "Yes! It's so fatalistic."

Me: "How so?"

F: "Well, you only use it when things are looking bad, ya know? You never use the word hope when things are good."

So, I started contemplating the hope conundrum and I began to understand. We don't say "I know you will get well soon" or "I am confident that I won't get food poisoning from that bad sushi I ate." We do use hope when things are, well, not so good. Even though it is used in expectancy of a positive outcome, do we really think things are going to come out all right?? Just because I say "I hope I win the lottery" every day doesn't mean that I have a chance in hell of winning it. Just because Brittney Spears says "I hope my idiotic behavior doesn't cause permanent emotional damage to my children" doesn't mean that they won't end up on some MTV reality show 20 years from now. And just because the title of the movie was "Hope Floats" doesn't mean that the movie didn't sink in the box office faster than the Titanic.

Hope - The new four-letter word.

(I hope I haven't offended anyone.)

New Year

Reader: Why bother having a blog if you never update it?

Me: Yeah, I know. Sorry. I'm a lame blogger.

Reader: I mean, it's not like you have anything else to do.

Me: Ha ha.

Reader: I know you're busy but what happened to the blog?

Me: When I started the blog I had more time to work on it - it was summertime and the livin' was easy. When things started getting busy again, something had to go. I mean, I have LOTS of ideas for things to write about....I guess I'm just lazy. Sorry.

Reader: It's OK, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I just hate it when someone starts something and then doesn't keep it up. Oops -- that sounds kind of naughty.

Me: Hey! This is a PG blog! Well, maybe R but watch it, OK?

Reader: Sorry, sorry. I lost my head. Oh oh, I said "head." Is that bad?

Me: Knock it off!

Reader: OK. So, do you think you'll try to do more blogging now?

Me: Yeah, I suppose so. I have some issues that are burning to be flamed.

Reader: That's good! Flame on! Wait, that's not dirty, right?

Me:............

Reader: Sorry. I couldn't resist. Hey, what does the picture have to do with this blog?

Me: Nothing. I just know that people don't like to read blogs if there aren't any photos.

Reader:.................

Word fun

lexiphanes

One who uses words pretentiously.

nosism

The use of 'we' in referring to oneself.

Insufficiency

When I attain to utter forth in verse
Some inward thought, my soul throbs audibly
Along my pulses, yearning to be free
And something farther, fuller, higher, rehearse
To the individual, true, and the universe,
In consummation of right harmony:
But, like a wind-exposed distorted tree,
We are blown against for ever by the curse
Which breathes through Nature. Oh, the world is weak !
The effluence of each is false to all,
And what we best conceive we fail to speak.
Wait, soul, until thine ashen garments fall,
And then resume thy broken strains, and seek
Fit peroration without let or thrall.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Learning to juggle

Reader: "Where the hell have you been?"

Me: "What do you mean? I've been here, more or less"

Reader: "I don't mean physically. I mean blog-wise. Why haven't you posted for so long?"

Me: "I've been a bit busy lately."

Reader: "Oh. Doing what, exactly?"

Me: "Well, let's see. It's the busiest time of the year for my business so that keeps me pretty busy during the day."

Reader: "Ya. OK. What else is new."

Me: "Um. Then there is my 88-year-old dad who has Parkinson's disease and is pretty pissed off about it. He takes up a bit of my time."

Reader: "Ya, ya, you're a good daughter, we know all that. But what about the blog?"

Me: "Then there is the STBX that finally moved out (sort of) and left behind a load of crap that has to be dealt with - including some of his emotional baggage. I didn't think you'd want to hear about that."

Reader: "Correctamundo! No emotional baggage talk, thank you very much. But there has to be something that you could rant/talk/blog about that might be of interest. Didn't you just take some sort of trip?"

Me: "Oh ya! Bali! That was awesome. I could post some cool photos and tell you about how I rode an elephant or how I had to pay to get out of the country. Would that be interesting?"

Reader: "Yes. That might be nice. As long as you don't go on too long or show too many pictures of all the food you ate."

Me: "Oh. Well that will limit the number of pictures considerably and I'll keep the stories short."

Reader: "Good. Nothing bores a reader more than hearing about the FOOD you ate in some foreign country. I mean, come on. One story about food is OK but don't go overboard."

Me: "Got it. Short and sweet (or sour or tangy, depending on the food). "

Reader: "Anything new on the health front? I'm almost afraid to ask."

Me: "Well, there have been a few blips on the radar with regard to my 'condition' but I don't want to bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that I might be asking for more hats for Christmas. But let's not talk about that yet - we'll cross that rickety bridge if/when we get to it and then we'll all have Mojitos when we get to the other side."

Reader: "Crap! OK. I promise not to ask about your health again. Anything else?"

Me: "Since you asked.....we had to put our 17-year-old dog to sleep earlier this week. It was very sad but definitely the right thing to do. He went quickly and was munching away on dog treats at the time - his favorite thing to do."

Reader: "Bummer! You HAVE had a lot to do lately. I'm sorry I bothered you about the blog. You must think I'm a total jerk."

Me: "No no! Not at all. I really appreciate your interest. I was just worried that I would sound too whiny if I tried to post all this stuff. It helps to get it all off my chest, ya know? Thanks for listening."

Reader: "No problem. Glad to help. So, next post - Bali?"

Me: "And Singapore. Don't forget about Singapore!"

Reader: "Great! I'm looking forward to it."

hallelujah

Whilst listening to Jeff Buckley's awesome version of the song Hallelujah, I decided I needed to post something. It's been a while, I know, but I've had a lot going on. Maybe a little too much. I'll try to recap the last few weeks as briefly as possible:

work = busy
home life = strained but moving forward
STBX = moved out
mood = good
on-line life = fun and different
OKC = over and out
UK friend = mad about me, calls daily
Other OKC friends = still in contact
off-line life = fun and different
dinner date = new "activity" partner (strictly platonic)
new activity partner = lots of gifts!
health = still in question but thinking positively
CT = clear
CA125 = not so clear (WTF!)
quest for iPod = complete!

That's it, in outline form. I am ramping up for my trip to Singapore and Bali at the end of the week!!!!!!!!! Only problem is I have NO idea what I'm going to wear. It's going to be over 90 and sticky the whole time I'm there. I don't know about you but if I'm wearing a skirt and it's hot and sticky, so are my thighs. I hate that. I'll have to do some creative wardrobe thinking. As Edna Mode would say - NO SHORTS! I'm going to try to post while there if I can. I'll take lots of pictures and keep a hand written diary (imagine that) so I will have lots of fodder for the blog.

love it!

bissextile
Of or pertaining to the leap year or the extra day in the leap year.

Is that a great word or what!