4 letter word

I was perusing a catalog with a friend of mine when we came across some kitchy wrought iron words that you put on your wall - words like "live, love, laugh," etc.. One of the words was "hope." Here is the conversation that ensued:

F: "I hate that word; it's so depressing."

Me: "What word? Hope?"

F: "Yes! It's so fatalistic."

Me: "How so?"

F: "Well, you only use it when things are looking bad, ya know? You never use the word hope when things are good."

So, I started contemplating the hope conundrum and I began to understand. We don't say "I know you will get well soon" or "I am confident that I won't get food poisoning from that bad sushi I ate." We do use hope when things are, well, not so good. Even though it is used in expectancy of a positive outcome, do we really think things are going to come out all right?? Just because I say "I hope I win the lottery" every day doesn't mean that I have a chance in hell of winning it. Just because Brittney Spears says "I hope my idiotic behavior doesn't cause permanent emotional damage to my children" doesn't mean that they won't end up on some MTV reality show 20 years from now. And just because the title of the movie was "Hope Floats" doesn't mean that the movie didn't sink in the box office faster than the Titanic.

Hope - The new four-letter word.

(I hope I haven't offended anyone.)

New Year

Reader: Why bother having a blog if you never update it?

Me: Yeah, I know. Sorry. I'm a lame blogger.

Reader: I mean, it's not like you have anything else to do.

Me: Ha ha.

Reader: I know you're busy but what happened to the blog?

Me: When I started the blog I had more time to work on it - it was summertime and the livin' was easy. When things started getting busy again, something had to go. I mean, I have LOTS of ideas for things to write about....I guess I'm just lazy. Sorry.

Reader: It's OK, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. I just hate it when someone starts something and then doesn't keep it up. Oops -- that sounds kind of naughty.

Me: Hey! This is a PG blog! Well, maybe R but watch it, OK?

Reader: Sorry, sorry. I lost my head. Oh oh, I said "head." Is that bad?

Me: Knock it off!

Reader: OK. So, do you think you'll try to do more blogging now?

Me: Yeah, I suppose so. I have some issues that are burning to be flamed.

Reader: That's good! Flame on! Wait, that's not dirty, right?

Me:............

Reader: Sorry. I couldn't resist. Hey, what does the picture have to do with this blog?

Me: Nothing. I just know that people don't like to read blogs if there aren't any photos.

Reader:.................

Word fun

lexiphanes

One who uses words pretentiously.

nosism

The use of 'we' in referring to oneself.

Insufficiency

When I attain to utter forth in verse
Some inward thought, my soul throbs audibly
Along my pulses, yearning to be free
And something farther, fuller, higher, rehearse
To the individual, true, and the universe,
In consummation of right harmony:
But, like a wind-exposed distorted tree,
We are blown against for ever by the curse
Which breathes through Nature. Oh, the world is weak !
The effluence of each is false to all,
And what we best conceive we fail to speak.
Wait, soul, until thine ashen garments fall,
And then resume thy broken strains, and seek
Fit peroration without let or thrall.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Learning to juggle

Reader: "Where the hell have you been?"

Me: "What do you mean? I've been here, more or less"

Reader: "I don't mean physically. I mean blog-wise. Why haven't you posted for so long?"

Me: "I've been a bit busy lately."

Reader: "Oh. Doing what, exactly?"

Me: "Well, let's see. It's the busiest time of the year for my business so that keeps me pretty busy during the day."

Reader: "Ya. OK. What else is new."

Me: "Um. Then there is my 88-year-old dad who has Parkinson's disease and is pretty pissed off about it. He takes up a bit of my time."

Reader: "Ya, ya, you're a good daughter, we know all that. But what about the blog?"

Me: "Then there is the STBX that finally moved out (sort of) and left behind a load of crap that has to be dealt with - including some of his emotional baggage. I didn't think you'd want to hear about that."

Reader: "Correctamundo! No emotional baggage talk, thank you very much. But there has to be something that you could rant/talk/blog about that might be of interest. Didn't you just take some sort of trip?"

Me: "Oh ya! Bali! That was awesome. I could post some cool photos and tell you about how I rode an elephant or how I had to pay to get out of the country. Would that be interesting?"

Reader: "Yes. That might be nice. As long as you don't go on too long or show too many pictures of all the food you ate."

Me: "Oh. Well that will limit the number of pictures considerably and I'll keep the stories short."

Reader: "Good. Nothing bores a reader more than hearing about the FOOD you ate in some foreign country. I mean, come on. One story about food is OK but don't go overboard."

Me: "Got it. Short and sweet (or sour or tangy, depending on the food). "

Reader: "Anything new on the health front? I'm almost afraid to ask."

Me: "Well, there have been a few blips on the radar with regard to my 'condition' but I don't want to bore you with the details. Suffice it to say that I might be asking for more hats for Christmas. But let's not talk about that yet - we'll cross that rickety bridge if/when we get to it and then we'll all have Mojitos when we get to the other side."

Reader: "Crap! OK. I promise not to ask about your health again. Anything else?"

Me: "Since you asked.....we had to put our 17-year-old dog to sleep earlier this week. It was very sad but definitely the right thing to do. He went quickly and was munching away on dog treats at the time - his favorite thing to do."

Reader: "Bummer! You HAVE had a lot to do lately. I'm sorry I bothered you about the blog. You must think I'm a total jerk."

Me: "No no! Not at all. I really appreciate your interest. I was just worried that I would sound too whiny if I tried to post all this stuff. It helps to get it all off my chest, ya know? Thanks for listening."

Reader: "No problem. Glad to help. So, next post - Bali?"

Me: "And Singapore. Don't forget about Singapore!"

Reader: "Great! I'm looking forward to it."

hallelujah

Whilst listening to Jeff Buckley's awesome version of the song Hallelujah, I decided I needed to post something. It's been a while, I know, but I've had a lot going on. Maybe a little too much. I'll try to recap the last few weeks as briefly as possible:

work = busy
home life = strained but moving forward
STBX = moved out
mood = good
on-line life = fun and different
OKC = over and out
UK friend = mad about me, calls daily
Other OKC friends = still in contact
off-line life = fun and different
dinner date = new "activity" partner (strictly platonic)
new activity partner = lots of gifts!
health = still in question but thinking positively
CT = clear
CA125 = not so clear (WTF!)
quest for iPod = complete!

That's it, in outline form. I am ramping up for my trip to Singapore and Bali at the end of the week!!!!!!!!! Only problem is I have NO idea what I'm going to wear. It's going to be over 90 and sticky the whole time I'm there. I don't know about you but if I'm wearing a skirt and it's hot and sticky, so are my thighs. I hate that. I'll have to do some creative wardrobe thinking. As Edna Mode would say - NO SHORTS! I'm going to try to post while there if I can. I'll take lots of pictures and keep a hand written diary (imagine that) so I will have lots of fodder for the blog.

love it!

bissextile
Of or pertaining to the leap year or the extra day in the leap year.

Is that a great word or what!

Animus

I've been struggling with what could be called "writer's block," but that would be presumptuous as I am not truly a writer in the classical sense. Is there a thing called "blogger's block?" If so, that's what I've had.....until this morning.

This morning I took out the New York Times' Magazine, as usual, and out came the obnoxiously fat, tree-killing, toxic ink filled Eye Candy: Women's Fashion Fall 2007. Normally I happily toss these special editions into the recycle bin without a glance. For some unknown reason I decided to flip through this ventilation of style. Perhaps this was caused by some imbalance of my limbic system or the need for more greens in my diet. Regardless of the reason, it did help me break out of my literary stagnation. And it PISSED ME OFF!

Now, I am not against looking nice, wearing clothes that make you feel attractive, getting a haircut that is flattering, but I do have a problem with so-called high fashion. Let's not get into the bit about how no normal shaped people can wear any of it, or afford it if they could wear it, or want to be seen dead in most of it. Let's skip right to the part about the waste of human resources and what a slap in the face it is to most of the earthly population. The amount of time and money put into this vapid industry is staggering! And who does it benefit? Who??? If Dior or Vera Wang were to suddenly disappear from the planet, would the balance of nature be thrown out of whack? Would the glaciers melt or the temperature of the oceans suddenly rise? It might change the economic status of some small community in China, throwing its slave labor into the street, but it would not cause any major shift in the space time continuum. Imagine what could be done with that money! The people it could house and feed....and clothe! It isn't a club to which I feel the need to belong.....anymore.

When I was a kid, we lived in West Palm Beach, Florida. West Palm was to the west (on the mainland) of one of one of the world's Mecca's of vacuousness - Palm Beach. We drove over to "the island" every weekend to mingle with the rich folk. We strolled through the shops on Worth Avenue (ironically named, I think) and sunned on its beaches. As a teen, I crashed parties at The Breakers on New Year's Eve and pretended to be staying at a number of the other high-class hotels while using their pools or private beaches. This required a great deal of planned dialogue with my cohorts that could be heard by other patrons to prove our rightful belonging. These fake conversations included references to our yacht, our trip to St. Barts, a visit to our Aunt in Cannes, etc. Any mention of a sale at Jordan Marsh or problems with one's Dodge Dart were strictly forbidden for they could blow your cover in a heart beat! Also, the carrying of a stolen room key was essential for credibility. (One of our cohorts actually lived in Palm Beach as a child, before her parents' fall from grace and economic decline, and had several important icons from her past that allowed us access to forbidden places.)

I would like to think that I didn't go to these places so much because of a desire to be like these people - I thought they were rude and ridiculous for the most part - but because I wanted to put one over on them, so to speak. I wanted to wear my Sears bought bathing suit in their gold-plated pools and my K-Mart flip flops on their teak decks and rub it in their face. I wanted them to know that they had nothing on me. Oh yes, I bought my requisite Izod shirt at the Izod store on the Ave, I wore my Speary Topsider shoes, and I ate at the absurdly overpriced Hamburger Heaven with my mother, but I like to think that I never bought into all the "we are better than you" crap that flowed like honey over there. One of my high school buddies worked for Gucci on the Ave and was in charge of taking care of the designer's apartment above the shop. We spent several evenings wandering through the apartment, spying on the inner workings of the über-rich. Guess what - they have to buy toilet paper and foot cream, just like everybody else. I'm not sure where I'm going with all this but it just seemed like something I needed to get out.

As I sit in my bed wearing my Olympic National Park T-shirt and my pajama bottoms with dancing reindeer on them, I reflect on what it means to be stylish and what if any importance this has on my ability to function in this world. I do think that beauty has it's place - in nature, mostly - and it would not be a happy world if we all dressed and looked alike. I just wish we could do it within reason and not at the expense of others.

Books on tape

I have become addicted to listening to books on tape or CD. When I was home last year, recovering from the removal of a great deal of my insides, my brother loaned me his iPod full of books. (I believe that I now have a permanent dent in one of my ears where I slept on one of the ear buds.) I listened to at least 40 books during that time and now I find that I can not go to sleep at night without something on the Aiwa - my cheap mini stereo purchased at the local pawn shop. In the beginning of my addiction I would cruise the shelves of the local library for my new drug, often bringing home lower quality items just for the sake of having something. I have since graduated to cruising my library account on the Web and requesting higher quality stuff to be delivered to our little library in LFP. This has allowed me to be more selective but sometimes means that I have to wait for what I need. (Thank goodness we own some Harry Potter CDs to fill in the gaps.)

My latest listen is fantastic: Behind the Scenes at the Museum by Kate Atkinson;the Whitbread Book of the Year (1995?). Not only is it highly amusing and wonderfully written, it is read by Susan Jameson; a great British actress. I find that I am spoiled by books read by Brits. When I get a book read by an American speaker, it is almost always disappointing, no matter how great the story. The only exception to this was The Poisonwood Bible read with a heavy southern accent appropriate to the story. The back of a box of cornflakes read aloud by a Brit could sound like Shakespeare, I think. I will have to ask my new UK friends if they think an American's accent sounds at all pleasing or exotic. Probably not.

Zoo Day

I love the zoo. If I had the time I would be a docent. I use to have doubts about the need for zoos so I have tried to learn more about them. They do serve a purpose other than entertaining humans. I will continue to support this zoo for a very long time.


Wallaroos enjoying the sunshine



I love the butterfly house


Golden Lion Tamarin


One of our favorites


We actually got to FEED the giraffes! It was amazing. They are such beautiful animals.



The elephants are still mourning the loss of Hansa.

Life is like......

......a sushi bar conveyor belt.

I was having lunch with my daughter yesterday at Blue C Sushi when the meaning of life hit me in the face like a wet mackerel.

You sit at the bar and watch different choices pass in front of you. Sometimes you have to wait for what you want to come by; sometimes you choose something that turns out to be not so good; sometimes you have to push the little button to get someones attention so they can get you what you want. The dishes pile up and you pay for what you've taken.

There are those of you out there that sit and wait and wait for the right thing to come by and never think of pushing the little button, and there are those of you out there that see what they want but are afraid to take it for fear that it won't be good. The balanced person takes what they want, asks for help when they need it, is willing to take a chance on the unsure, and can pay for it all. What kind of person are you?

I know you've missed this kind of entry.....

Here is a photo of someone who wanted to chat with me today. He lives in Pratt, KS - appropriately enough. He describes himself as a crossdresser, openminded and submissive.

"I am looking for a friend that I can go into Wichita and have help me shop for dresses, skirts, and other fun clothes. I love Maurices, Fredericks, Macys, and all the nice stores. I also enjoy going to the adult stores and trying on lingerie. Would love to have someone to shop with."

Let me be clear....I have nothing, and I do mean nothing against cross dressers, open minded, or submissive people but.... why write to me? I don't live in Wichita; I can't take you shopping; and I certainly don't look good in short plaid skirts!

In other news, I did receive the most amazing short story from one of my UK friends today. It was brilliant! He was entering it in a contest and I hope he wins. I wish I could write like that. I'll see if he will let me post it here some day.

Carry on!

Blah-ging

Sorry for not posting for a bit. I've been a little busy/lazy/tired. I guess having to read all of those messages from admirers really takes a lot out of a girl.

I'm really excited about all of the comments on my poly posting. I think this is what blogs are really for - an exchange of ideas. I've learned so much since that posting. Thanks to everyone for putting in their two cents.

On the OKC front: I've been corresponding with my two lads in the UK and really enjoying it. As I mentioned before, they are very different. One is a bit Eeyore-like and the other more like Rabbit, I think. Eeyore is sweet and kind and a bit unsure about his place in the world. He likes talking about everyday things - I think they bring him comfort. I enjoy talking with him but I find that I don't write with the same humor as I do with others. Funny how that happens.

Rabbit has some bitterness in his life but uses his sense of humor to struggle through it. He is the writer of ghost stories and is studying for his Ph.D. in English. We write very silly messages and LOL is used a lot. The trouble is, he sent me a few of his stories and asked for some input. This is a problem as I am not one to hide my opinion about things (surprise, surprise) and I thought the stories had some flaws. Okay, that's being too kind - some of them were not too bad but two were really awful. I made what I thought were some constructive comments about the worst one and didn't say anything about the others. He assumed that this meant that I thought they were fine. Ack!! I think I'll have to ask him to stop sending me stories and switch to jewelry or chocolate instead.

On the flip side of this coin, I think by NiceGuy from Oregon is being just that - nice. He sent me a very sweet - maybe too sweet - message saying how lovely it is to chat with me and that he'll be busy this week and unable to write. When I checked the site this morning I noticed that he had time to post a rather long journal entry. I am pretty sure that he writes me just to be nice and doesn't want to hurt my feelings. How sad is that! Once, in my awkward youth, a friend of mine asked a boy I liked if he thought I was cute and his response was "she has good skin." This was kid code for "gag me." (bad flashback!) That's how NGs messages make me feel. Not ugly and awkward but just....not right.

It seems that my poly friend is the only one that I can be truly honest with! No chance of relationship so, nothing to hide or feel bad about. He wrote me to let me know that he and his partner had their au pair/girlfriend living with them now (she arrived from wherever it is they use to live) and so equilibrium has been achieved in his world. We still plan on getting together sometime but with the whole gang, I think. That should be fun! Nothing like being the fourth wheel with a threesome.

I'm sorry, but.......

Why me? This is from a 27-year-old guy in D.C.:

My name is xxxxxx and am from usa in st newjersey.am a businessman i have my own company and stores which i sell cloths,shoes,electronics and many more....I'm intelligent, fun,faithful..,I'm honest, caring, giving,hard worker, trusting, honest, ,open minded well I enjoy playing golf, watching movies,cooking dinner at home and watching t.v...am new on the internet i just join here am also new here well am a here looking for a woman i will spent the rest of my life with...I like to meet a woman who will be honest with me...THE woMAN I AM LOOKING FOR is able to share his heart and life with me..sHe is not on this site to play online games but wants to develop a real life long term loving relationship...as i told u am new that is why i have not fill much of my profile... I believe that true love exists. I just have to find it...I would like to find consistency and honesty in my partner. I can offer the world to the right person. Sometimes you have to take a chance on love. T I will have hers for sure.I'm looking for something serious and long term- so here I am . I love to travel,Friends are like diamonds; they are rare and very precious.
Treat them carefully and lovingly and keep them safe in your heart so you'll never lose them .....Stars are like friends; there's always some around, you just need to find your favorite one One of the best feelings in the world is to touch and warm someone's heart, whether it be your love or just a friend, almost nothing can feel better A best friend is like a four leaf clover, hard to find and lucky to have.....There comes a time in every life we find the heart we're looking for..All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us.Hello.. how are u doing i hope u are doing good as i am well i know that u are the woman i have been dreaming to have in life the woman i have been thinking when i was a child well... HOPE TO HERE FROM U SOOM......Yourfrined brown u can add me to your yahoo this is id high_spirit2003@yahoo.com see u byee :u can add me so we talk there okay take care and have a nice loving day...................

I'm sorry but, WTF! I feel a bit evil about posting this - I mean, I wouldn't want someone posting my lame-ass email on the internet for others to make fun of. But, WTF!!! At least the widower from NJ who was looking to replace his wife could complete a sentence.

Poly want to crack her?

Yesterday as I walked to work, I had time to think about my next blog post. (I wish I had one of those little tape recorders plugged into my brain so I could download all the thoughts - now I'll have to try and remember them all!) I wanted to write something clever about my recent education about the polyamorous world. Well, not so much an education but a Cliff's Notes browse. I did, at least, learn a new word: compersion (more about this later).

Let us begin with the Wikipedia definition of polyamory:

Polyamory (from poly=multiple + amor=love) is the desire, practice, or acceptance of having more than one loving, intimate relationship at a time with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Polyamory is distinct from polygamy, being closer to a personal outlook than a predefined bonding system. It is grounded in such concepts as choice, trust, equality of freewill, and the more novel idea of compersion, rather than in cultural or religious tradition.

Although I feel rather versed in the nuances of the gay world, having close friends and family members involved, I had not until very recently had a single clue about this part of society. Oh sure, I knew there were people out there with this inclination but I didn't know anything about their culture. (I still don't really know but I am learning, in a platonic way.) I don't want to comment about this directly so much as have a discussion (with myself) about the meaning of compersion and getting what one needs from the people in one's world.

Compersion is a term used by practitioners of polyamory to describe the experience of taking pleasure when one's partner is with another person. The term is often expressed as "the opposite of jealousy",^[2] since that term is used to describe one's pain at a lover's experiences with others.

Compersion can be said to be a form of empathy; i.e. pleasure that a loved one is experiencing a good thing in his or her life.

For many years I have been of the opinion that it is far more natural for humans to be attracted to more than one other human, either of the same or opposite sex, but we are ruled so strongly by social constraints that we can't think outside the box, so to speak. (I'm not a social scientist, nor do I play one on T.V., but I'm sure there is something in human history to do with the formation of communities that lead to these social constraints - survival of the species or taxes - since these constraints have been around pre-christianity.) I think more people would be "bi-curious" if they could break out of their social bonds. Now, I am a very liberal minded person but am definitely a victim of social bondage. I would like to think that I could feel compersion, that I could try to act outside the box, that I could find happiness with a person regardless of their sexual orientation, that I might be willing to participate in an unconventional relationship, that I could eat chocolate cake without feeling guilty, but I'm just not sure I could. Is this because of social brainwashing or just my nature? I'm sure I could feel compersion - I'm sure I do, actually - but I'm not sure about any of the other things.

I recently had a nice discussion with a SWM who said that he had tried several different "forbidden" things in his life because you never know what you might like until you try it. Now, there are certain things in life that I strongly believe shouldn't fall into this "try it, you might like it" philosophy - murder, heroin, driving on the wrong side of the road, wearing socks with sandals - but perhaps there are other things on this menu that we should all try out, at least once. I do know that I get different things from different relationships. For example, I have two pen-pals from England - both male, both writers, both live in a similar part of the country, both are desperate enough to write to me. My letters to one are of a more serious nature; we discuss global warming, the intricacies of human relationships, politics, our lack of facial hair. My letters to the other are far more silly ; we talk about movies, the outdoors, and other less serious things. Yet, I look forward to each letter with the same amount of anticipation because I get something different but equally fulfilling from both.

I'm not sure what side of the human fence this leaves me on yet but I do know that my butt is getting sore from sitting on top of it. But do we have to be on one side of the fence or the other? Isn't there some sort of no-mans land in between that we can function in happily?

One thing about polyamory that I know I couldn't embrace:

The adjective frubbly and the noun frubbles are sometimes used, in the poly community in the United Kingdom and the United States, to describe the feeling of compersion.^[3] These terms are more suited to cheerful, light-hearted conversation, and they are more grammatically versatile, for example: "I'm feeling all frubbly" and "Their relationship fills me with frubbles".

Sorry, but I don't think I could bring myself to say "frubbles" with a straight, bi-curious, or polyamorous face.

I am Kermit the Frog

I've started to really enjoy these little OKC tests. Some of the questions are outrageously funny or outrageously stupid. The shorter the better. Two more I took yesterday: What is Your Spirit Guide Animal? (Wolf - very hip) and What Seasame Street Character are You? (Kermie!). I like both of those outcomes, I think. Kermit is cool, right? I'm sure he's a Libra.

My child came back from vacation last night. Two weeks at grandmas was good but she was happy to be back with her dogs. Not back with me, mind you, but the dogs. They got a far more affectionate greeting than I did. I have to say that it did hurt my feelings just a bit, not that I was in any way surprised. She has always been better with animals than people but I gave birth to her for cryin' out loud! Long, painful, back-labor, c-section BIRTH!! I think I deserve a little hug and kiss now and then. (She did bring me a bag of LEGOs and some Jersey tomatoes.)

I'm humourous

62% Warmth, 50% Moisture

You are of the choleric temperament, ruled by the element of Fire. This humour's personality is usually active, energetic, hasty, and clever, but prone to foolishness through not taking the time to think. The medieval handbooks say that choleric people "have wine of the lion" - That is, they become angry and violent when drunk.

No, I don't! Really! I think I failed this test. Golden retrievers and otters are NOT angry drunks!

OKC update: The nice guy in Oregon that I thought was ignoring me has been writing to me. We had a very nice IM session this morning. (I love IM in the morning.) And then there is this kind of odd-in-a-good-way bloke in the UK who has been emailing me. I'm not sure why the 19-year-old from Kenmore sent me an email - maybe he thought I was his mom's friend or something. I don't even want to go there.

Mosquito Coast

Well, it wasn't really the coast so much as the bank of a river. I borrowed my neighbor's cabin (just west of Leavenworth) for the weekend for some much desired R&R. I went with my friend KnittinKitten, her daughter, and our dogs. It was clear the SECOND we got there that we were not going to get a lot of communing with nature done, unless you consider being covered with insects communing. The heat was a bit oppressive as well. Fortunately, we were all happy to be lazy and found lots to do (or not do) inside. We did venture in to Leavenworth for a day and practiced our running from shady spot to shady spot - the only exercise we got (besides improving our Yahtzee arms).

On the way to the cabin, we stopped at a rural market to grab something to make for dinner. (Thank goodness they were out of opossum!) This market had a little rundown restaurant attached to it called - sadly enough - The Happy Clown. This place was right out of an X-files episode, complete with inbred patrons and a female clerk with a shiner. The story possibilities are endless!!! The only thing missing was the banjo player. Oh, for some of Stephen King's literary genes!!!

I'm an otter-retriever

Let me explain. On the okcupid sight, they ask you to take all kinds of funny tests to get to know you better. I decided to take the animal personality test. I had a feeling I'd come out like a dog; otter was a bit of a surprise. Here are my test results:

Your Score: Otter-Retriever

You scored 65% Otter, 50% Lion, 30% Beaver, and 65% Golden Retriever!

Your personality is chacterized with both Golden Retriever and Otter personality traits.

Golden retrievers appreciate the value of a close relationship, and can deal with commitment. You're thoughtful, nurturing and tolerant... people know that they can go to you if they need to be comforted. However, your caring nature may make it difficult to say no, and your sensitivity can cause you to get hurt a lot. Golden Retrievers are very adaptable, compassionate, and great team players.

Otters are fun-loving, spontaneous creatures. Always optimistic, otters can sometimes overlook important details or move at a pace that's a little too fast for everyone to keep up with. They aren't usually into details, and may have a problem with procrastinating. However, otters are very social and have a great love for people. They may be very charismatic and have lots of friends.

Hmmm. I hope this doesn't mean that I will be rolling in dead things and liking my privates. It certainly doesn't help to explain why some bozo named h0tb0y sent me a message with a picture of himself spanking the monkey! Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!!! What is WRONG with people!

Sentence Sensibility

I wish I could say that the title of this post was of my own invention but it is not. It is, however, the title of an article in the New York Times Magazine that addresses my current predicament AND is a play on words using the title of one of my favorite books/movies. The author of the article, Jaimie Epstein, has been thrust into the world of online happiness seeking due to a broken heart. She is, by her own description, a "literary person," and often the editor of the famous On Language column for the Times. This causes her great distress when she receives emails from prospective suitors with misspellings, bad grammar, and all sorts of other language faux pas. I am not quite as bothered by malapropriated author's names or sentences ending in prepositions but perhaps only because I am not a language expert and a notoriously bad speller.

Some of the things Jaimie and I have in common are: 1] the need for seemingly endless self examination with regard to our new online persona; 2] the use of parenthetical asides (like this one) when we want to interject otherwise invisible social cues for our readers; 3] the unavoidable judgment of the other online happiness seekers based on their ability/inability to complete a comprehensible sentence and 4] the need to make lists. Okay, I'm not sure about that last one but the first three are definitely true. (And just so ya know, I had to spellcheck at least 3 of the words in the previous sentence.)

It was nice to read about someone in the same proverbial boat who saw light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. I'm not sure if I see a light or just the glare of the windshield of the oncoming bus but a girl's gotta hope!